Choose A Psychotherapist That Fits You! The How-To!

Choose the right psychotherapist

Trying to choose a psychotherapist that fits you can feel challenging, but that feeling is normal. Beginning psychotherapy, if you’ve never done that before, can also be a bit daunting. First of all, you don’t know what it’s going to be like. You don’t know if it will work for you or if you feel it’s a good match with the therapist. What if you find out you’ve been doing things the hard way or ineffectively? You are in good company if this rings a bell for you.  No worries. Here are some tips for finding the right therapist. I…

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How to Know When to Give Up on a Romantic Relationship

Why it’s Important to Know When The Relationship You Want Won’t Happen It’s challenging to know when to give up on a valued romantic relationship. Usually, others around you know when it’s time to give up on a relationship that doesn’t work and isn’t fulfilling for you. It’s often easier for them to see the signs than for their own relationships because it isn’t about them. They won’t feel the same pain you will if you break off your current relationship. Some people hang on forever, having the same hopes that don’t seem to come to fruition. But in general,…

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How To Trust Someone Again After They’ve Betrayed You & Broken Your Heart

Negative Effects of Poor Self-esteem

Have you been betrayed by someone you truly loved? Betrayal can be one of the most hurtful things to experience in any kind of relationship. It’ breaks trust. Once that’s broken, how do you get your trust back again? Is it even possible? How do you know trying again in that relationship is even worth it, or that it can’t happen again in the future? Click below for an article I wrote for YourTango about this very issue. How To Trust Someone Again After They’ve Betrayed You & Broken Your Heart   These other articles on my website discuss similar topics.…

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8 Personality Traits Are The Least Likely To Break Your Heart

Trustworthy Personality Traits

Relationships are vulnerable any way you look at it. But there are 8 personality traits that are more likely to lead to a healthy relationship. These traits also help you build trust in your mate and lessen the chance of heart break down the road. When we’re able to feel confident in our ability to trust “our person,” it lessens the extent of that vulnerability, making us feel more like partners in the world. Personally, I tend to trust someone until they’ve given me a reason not to, but there are definitely some specific personality traits I look for as…

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Effective Ways of Building Trust in Someone and Also Yourself

Building Trust

Romantic relationships are the most vulnerable relationships we have. Our heart does what it wants, whether it’s good for us or not. This is why building trust in someone is essential if you want to feel less vulnerable.   However, romantic relationships are not alone in causing a vulnerability. Children are very vulnerable because they don’t even know about trust and how to build it. They don’t get to pick their parents. Therefore, they must find their own way to feel emotionally safe and secure, kind of in the “dark”. We’ll discuss this further when it comes to Self-Esteem in this…

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11 Signs Of An Emotionally Safe and Secure Romantic Relationship

Signs Of A Secure Relationship

Emotionally safe and secure relationships are not just about romantic relationships. It’s essential to have safe and secure relationships with family, friends, coworkers, etc.  However, in certain ways, this is not always in our control – especially in families. We don’t choose our family members, and they may not want the same things as you do. Or they may not be willing to risk doing the work to have a secure bond. For an overview of the Relationship Checklist article as a whole, click here: This article is about developing those relationships that are healthier for you, whether it’s romantic,…

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Relationship Checklist for Couples – Explained

Realtionship Checklist Intro

This article explains the concepts behind the Relationship Checklist that I introduced in a previous article (Link). Relationships are like a Greenhouse: You have especially chosen your flowers and plants because they are appealing to you and give you joy. But just like a greenhouse, relationships need loving care and a lot of work and maintenance to flourish. They need to be nourished in order to grow. Stop this maintenance and you get weeds! The Relationship Checklist assembles the ingredients I have discovered over the years for a healthy garden. It takes practice and the willingness to be vulnerable with the…

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Relationship Checklist For Couples and Singles – Intro

Realtionship Checklist Intro

Great relationships that endure over time have common behaviors and values that create a healthy and nourishing bond. This relationship checklist works for both couples and singles. It identifies the needed ingredients for a healthy and enduring romantic relationship. You can find a link to a downloadable version of the Relationship Checklist at the end of the article. We naturally want a close, loving, emotionally safe relationship with someone we cherish. What goes into making a relationship successful? Relationships are a lot of work and that will never change. We want to value, respect someone with whom we want to…

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Essential Tips for Dealing With Your Life Crisis (Medical, Financial, Relationship, Divorce)

Pic of person in crisis

Sometimes a life crisis (medical, financial, or a family member’s divorce) can be dealt with more easily than an ongoing unhealthy family dynamic. If you are dealing with unhealthy family issues that are ongoing, see my article entitled How To Cope With Family Drama Without Falling Apart. A life crisis often leads to family drama. Effective communication can make the difference between healthy or challenging family relationships, as well as managing family drama and scary situations. Every traumatic event has effective communication skills that work and help you focus on the issue at hand. Below are various types of situations…

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11 Signs to Find The Right Mate For a Successful Relationship

Find the Rt Mate

Finding the right mate for a successful relationship requires knowing and valuing yourself first, and what you want. We tend to attract the same level of self-esteem in our mate as what we have in ourselves. It’s not a guessing game If you know what you want and also have those same qualities. I am not saying that you two need to be the same person. However, you need to have a lot in common to share a life together. Here are some guidelines to determine what you want and if your guy or girl is the right one. 1.…

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