Improving Self Image

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A healthy self-image is fluid. Over the course of a lifetime, it can have a ripple effect on our relationships, the decisions we make and the life we live.
The articles below may help your current situation or you can suggest an article or get help by contacting Susan Saint-Welch HERE. She does not provide psychotherapy by email or outside California.


What is the Difference Between Self-Image and Self-Esteem?

Self-Esteem vs Self-Image

Deepak Chopra clarifies the difference between Self-Image and Self-Esteem: “Do not confuse your image with your Self — your self-image is what other people think of you, and your Self (esteem) is what you think of you.”  He has also stated that self-image is how we want others to see us. Either way, our self-esteem is more internal and our self-image is projected outwardly. Let’s take a deeper look into the difference between self-image and self-esteem and how each affects our life.   The Difference Between Self-Image and Self-Esteem Ever feel uncomfortable in a room filled with people you don’t…

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Where Does Self-Image Come From?

Self-Image vs Self-Esteem

Self-image comes from how we view ourselves and how we appear to others. But it is more than just that. How does our self-image differ from our self-esteem? First, let’s take a look at Webster’s Dictionary on the true meaning of self-image. Websters Dictionary defines “Self-Image” as “one’s conception of oneself or one’s role.”  But is self-image different than our self-esteem? And how does each occur? What does our self-image do for us? And can we improve our self-image if we don’t like it? Self-Image, Self-Esteem and True Self are not the same, but they are all related to one…

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Men – Know The Signs of Low Self-Esteem and How to Fix It

Men who show signs of low self-esteem often keep it to themselves,  believing that it’s “what men do”. They have been taught to just “suck it up” and deal with it. Healthy women are more supportive of each other. Men, you can fix this!  But don’t pity yourself, guys. Less emotionally healthy women may not be as “upfront” and transparent with their female friends if they are in a competitive group. They too can be left to deal with their own sense of low self-esteem. They don’t teach much about low self-esteem in school, if at all. So here’s what you…

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6 Ways to Find Your True Self – It’s Not Magic

friends together

Finding your True Self means becoming aware of those around you, what makes you happy, and what does not. When you feel good about yourself and when you don’t. They don’t teach this in school, so how are you to know how to do something you have never been taught? So don’t be so hard on yourself if you feel lost or having no real identity. I will show you 6 ways that you can find your True Self, your gifts, and what makes you happy and what does not. Look around you and inside yourself and you will begin…

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How Your Self-Esteem Dramatically Affects How You Date

Self-Esteem & Dating

In dating, how you feel about yourself, your “self-esteem”, will be either projected onto others or secretly hidden from them. And this occurs whether or not you are aware of doing it. How we feel about ourselves affects the friends we attract, as well as future dating partners or mates. We tend to attract the same degree of self-esteem in others that we feel about ourselves. Therefore, if you are not liking your friends or dating prospects you need to do a check on how you feel about yourself first. Dating is uncomfortable because we want to be seen as…

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Don’t Turn On & Off Your Values. You Will Lose Your Core

Our values determine how we live our life. They are not a light switch we turn on and off at our whim. They form a screen through which we interpret the world and color our decision-making, our interests, and our goals in life. The values we choose to live by, healthy or not, often determine our direction in life, and the things we want to achieve and experience. They help identify those things in life that are most important to us, such as what is right and wrong behavior in ourselves, and those we choose to be around. Choose your…

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Don’t Call Me Scrooge! I Just “Celebrate” Differently.

CelebrateDifferently

Have you been called “Scrooge” before? Can’t enjoy the holidays? There’s nothing wrong with you. You just “celebrate” differently. Some people enjoy the holidays. They celebrate the hustle and bustle, the shopping, the decorating, the cooking, and the back-to-back parties. Some people choose to de-emphasize the presents and celebrate the decorations and the spirit of giving around them. Some people are cynical and see nothing more than people being “brainwashed” to spend a lot of money because “that’s what people do”. Or a scheme by the department stores to have people spend more money than they have. Others are reminded…

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Breaking the Cycle of Unhealthy Relationships – Part 2

Breaking the Cycle Part 2

In this third and final article in the series, we cover how children who have survived growing up with unhealthy parenting relationships can change their learned behaviors to better cope with life. The initial article in this series [LINK] explained how their difficulties in coping and personality result from growing up with their unhealthy family dynamics. It is how they survived. The previous article [LINK] and this article cover the positive changes that can happen with practice over time for each of the learned negative behaviors. The acronym “ACA” stands for “Adult Children of Alcoholics” and will also refer to…

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Breaking the Cycle of Unhealthy Relationships – Part 1

Breaking the Cycle

The previous article in this series listed the negative effects that can result in children raised by one or more unhealthy parents. These children are in danger of continuing this cycle of unhealthy relationships. They, and their children, often grow up as adults who feel “broken” – that they have something wrong or missing in them, and they do not know why. They think it must just be “ME”. On the contrary, their difficulties in coping and personality result from growing up with their unhealthy family dynamics. It is how they survived. The next two articles in this series cover…

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Dating and Self-Esteem: How One Affects the Other

Bad dating experiences affect our Self-Esteem, but this is the end of the cycle – not where it begins. Our Self-Esteem very much affects how we present ourselves and the impression it leaves on other people. Are we confident? Or do we feel we have little to offer someone? Do we set the bar low, expecting little from our dates, believing this is all we deserve? This is just the beginning of how our Self-Esteem affects our Dating choices and experiences. Poor self-esteem when we begin dating can initiate a downward spiral of bad dating experiences. This reinforces our poor…

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