Susan Saint-Welch LMFT has counseled couples and individuals for many years on issues such as dating, marriage, family drama, coping with difficult times, improving self-image and living the life you love. She provides psychotherapy for clients in California and Dating, Couples and Life Coaching for clients outside California through secure video conferencing. She has published numerous articles regarding these issues on her website, on and on

Feel Like Giving Up on Finding a Mate? Read This First!

Finding a Mate

When a person says they “want” to find a mate, but “somehow” it never works out, there is likely something in the way of them finding that mate. Sound familiar? No worries. You are not alone. Let’s take a look at what might be in your way and what to do to move forward one way or another. Reasons People Give Up Finding a Mate Fear of Rejection or Deeply Hurt by Another Person.  No one wants to get hurt. But if you are trying to find the “right” person for you, you’re probably going to have to go through…

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Okay to Ask if Someone Has Been Vaccinated for Covid-19?

ask if someone has been vaccinated

The short answer is “YES”. Here’s why: Wikipedia released statistics on May 5, 2021 prior to posting this article: 577 thousand people have died from Covid-19 just in the United States. 32.5 million cases have been reported in the United States alone. 154 Million cases reported in the World. Of those Covid-19 cases world-wide, 3.22 million people died so far. So you certainly have the right to be concerned and ask someone if they have been vaccinated. However, people also have the right to decline to answer that question, at least in the United States. Here, they have the right…

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What Have You Learned About Yourself During the Covid-19 Pandemic?

COVID Life Lessons

For many people, the Covid-19 pandemic brought with it many challenges. But with those challenges comes a great opportunity to have learned about yourself. For example, how you deal with the unknown or that you didn’t have your group of friends around you? Did you build new trust in your coping abilities? Do you recognize what you could have done differently? If you live with a partner, what have you both learned about your relationship? Let’s take a look at some of the positive things that may have come out of the pandemic.   How Did You Deal With Being…

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Taking Our Childhood Experiences into Adulthood With Negative Effects

Childhood Experiences Into Adulthood

Our negative childhood experiences shape who we are: But you can fix it now!  Some people are fortunate to have parents that are active, caring, and supportive. Perhaps they also demonstrate they believe in their kids to move forward in life, thriving. However, some parents did not know how to guide their children because they had no guidance in their childhood.  Those children who were supported, valued, and felt loved by their parents find it easier to move forward in life because they likely believe in themselves. With their parent’s love and support, these individuals believe they deserve to be…

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Self-Blame is Toxic and Unhelpful…But It’s Fixable!

Self-Blame is Toxic

We all experience “self-blaming” at times. But because self-blame is toxic, it means we are devaluing ourselves and denying the humanness in us all. I am well versed in this subject because even though I am a trained and licensed psychotherapist, I will still do this from time to time. When I experience self-blame, I know this is coming from the little girl inside that didn’t know any better in growing up. I never understood that we are all human and infallible. We all make mistakes along the way in life. Here is how easily we pick up this damaging…

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Take Control of This New Year! Here’s How to Make it Work For YOU!

Take Control Of This New Year

When you truly take control of this New Year, things don’t just magically happen. They happen because you are doing those things that really work for you and make you happy. It means you put the work into your life to make positive changes. Making these changes means you value and believe in yourself. This isn’t just “Hype.” This really works! Here’s what you need to do:   Identify What Isn’t Working For You and Makes You Unhappy To make changes that truly impact your current life experiences, you need first to identify what works and what is not working for…

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Don’t Be Stuck in Your Life – Try Creating a Flow Instead

Creating A Flow

When we’re creating a flow in our life we actually use up less “heartbeats” as I call it. By this, I mean learning to panic less and instead, to create a belief in ourselves that we can figure things out.  And yes, this is possible to do, and it works! What is a Flow and What Does it Look Like? When we are creating a flow in our life we let go of unhealthy expectations that don’t work for us. We build trust in ourselves that we will get through difficult times. It’s the acceptance that we won’t always have…

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Accepting a Reality I Don’t Want – How To Make it Work For Me

Accepting Reality

Accepting our reality in a given situation doesn’t mean we are forced to “like it”. We almost always have a choice.  In life, we may be forced to accept a given situation that is out of our control. When that happens we have a choice to “accept what is” or to fight against the tide. But even if we fight, we may not get what we want in the end.   Accepting Reality Where We Have Some Control to Make a Result Work in Our Favor Sometimes, rather than being fired, we are given a choice to quit a job…

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Where People Go Wrong in Their Current Dating Choices

If you are one of the many people who go wrong in dating choices, you are in good company. We all have been there at one time or another. The “fun-loving,” often drunk, confident, and popular individuals aren’t always what they’re “cracked up to be.” You’ve heard of the often-used phrase “careful what you ask for; you might just get it.” Now, this doesn’t apply to every popular, attractive, highly intelligent, etc., person. I’m talking about the “wanna-bees” who inside really feel insecure and not at all what they appear to be. One of the biggest downfalls of potential relationships…

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Dealing With A COVID-19 Thanksgiving – How To Make It Work

COVID-19 Thanksgiving

This Thanksgiving holiday is like no other, at least not in most people’s generation. But you can still make this COVID-19 Thanksgiving Holiday work for you. It won’t always be this way. Eventually, we will return to our more normal life again. It’s really important to grab hold of the reality of this situation but to still find a way to make it better for you. It’s about accepting “what is” our current reality. The unknown can be scary because we don’t know what the outcome will be. We don’t know how to stop an illness we are experiencing for…

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