Susan Saint-Welch LMFT has counseled couples and individuals for many years on issues such as dating, marriage, family drama, coping with difficult times, improving self-image and living the life you love. She provides psychotherapy for clients in California and Dating, Couples and Life Coaching for clients outside California through secure video conferencing. She has published numerous articles regarding these issues on her website, on and on

Choose A Psychotherapist That Fits You! The How-To!

Choose the right psychotherapist

Trying to choose a psychotherapist that fits you can feel challenging, but that feeling is normal. Beginning psychotherapy, if you’ve never done that before, can also be a bit daunting. First of all, you don’t know what it’s going to be like. You don’t know if it will work for you or if you feel it’s a good match with the therapist. What if you find out you’ve been doing things the hard way or ineffectively? You are in good company if this rings a bell for you.  No worries. Here are some tips for finding the right therapist. I…

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How to Find your True & Positive Self and Get Past Negative Experiences

Get Past Negative Experiences

We all come from a variety of backgrounds, experiences (good and bad), and lessons we learned along the way. But often on this path, we find that we may focus on our faults rather than find our true and positive self. Even though you may have had a rough childhood, or had to move around a lot as a child, you always had value. You just may have not been shown that in growing up. Or sometimes, parents can be nurturing but our school experiences wipe out the positive experiences at home. After all, how many of us believed that…

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Thinking of Dating Someone New During Covid-19? The How-To:

Ahh, this is a crazy time for everyone right now.  If you’re thinking of dating someone new during Covid-19, there are some practical tips to know before the first date.  If you read the literature on Covid-19, you will see that it can be tricky to maintain safe dating. However, you don’t have to give up dating right now if you do it safely! Let’s see how that would work. Let’s begin by talking about what could happen if you don’t date in safe ways these days. Dating Someone New During Covid-19 What Do Safe Dating Practices look Like These…

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Part Two: Improving Your Self-Esteem In a Relationship

In Part One, we discussed why self-esteem is so important, especially healthy self-esteem. Next, we’ll talk about improving your self-esteem in a relationship. First, let’s take a closer look to fully understand how you got low self-esteem and how you can improve your view of Self.  Why Do I Have Low Self-Esteem? How Did I Get it? There are lots of ways this occurs: The most significant part of creating healthy self-esteem is understanding why you feel “less than” others deep down inside yourself. For some, if they look back in time, they will remember instances of parents blaming them…

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Why Is Healthy Self-Esteem So Vital In Dating And Relationships?

Families and schools most always don’t teach how to have healthy self-esteem. So how are you to know how to have a healthy view of yourself? Why is this so important in dating and choosing a mate one day? Can your self-esteem improve when you’re already in a permanent relationship? And is healthy self-esteem necessary to have a good romantic relationship and marriage? Let’s take a look at these questions and more.   What Does Healthy Self-Esteem Look Like? First, let’s start with some examples of how our self-esteem can be healthy or unhealthy. Here are some of the qualities…

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How to Know When to Give Up on a Romantic Relationship

Why it’s Important to Know When The Relationship You Want Won’t Happen It’s challenging to know when to give up on a valued romantic relationship. Usually, others around you know when it’s time to give up on a relationship that doesn’t work and isn’t fulfilling for you. It’s often easier for them to see the signs than for their own relationships because it isn’t about them. They won’t feel the same pain you will if you break off your current relationship. Some people hang on forever, having the same hopes that don’t seem to come to fruition. But in general,…

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Finding True Success: Know When to Change Your Direction

Finding true success requires recognizing when you need to change direction. Often, we are so focused on succeeding, we fear changing direction and that’s how we fail. However, it doesn’t need to go that way. If you understand what works for you and what doesn’t, you can easily avoid blaming yourself and move forward in a better direction.  If we can’t see how something can work, it’s too easy to just give up. But you don’t need to do that if you understand that going a different way is not failure. What’s most important is to recalculate what works and…

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Feel Like Giving Up on Finding a Mate? Read This First!

Finding a Mate

When a person says they “want” to find a mate, but “somehow” it never works out, there is likely something in the way of them finding that mate. Sound familiar? No worries. You are not alone. Let’s take a look at what might be in your way and what to do to move forward one way or another. Reasons People Give Up Finding a Mate Fear of Rejection or Deeply Hurt by Another Person.  No one wants to get hurt. But if you are trying to find the “right” person for you, you’re probably going to have to go through…

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Okay to Ask if Someone Has Been Vaccinated for Covid-19?

ask if someone has been vaccinated

The short answer is “YES”. Here’s why: Wikipedia released statistics on May 5, 2021 prior to posting this article: 577 thousand people have died from Covid-19 just in the United States. 32.5 million cases have been reported in the United States alone. 154 Million cases reported in the World. Of those Covid-19 cases world-wide, 3.22 million people died so far. So you certainly have the right to be concerned and ask someone if they have been vaccinated. However, people also have the right to decline to answer that question, at least in the United States. Here, they have the right…

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What Have You Learned About Yourself During the Covid-19 Pandemic?

COVID Life Lessons

For many people, the Covid-19 pandemic brought with it many challenges. But with those challenges comes a great opportunity to have learned about yourself. For example, how you deal with the unknown or that you didn’t have your group of friends around you? Did you build new trust in your coping abilities? Do you recognize what you could have done differently? If you live with a partner, what have you both learned about your relationship? Let’s take a look at some of the positive things that may have come out of the pandemic.   How Did You Deal With Being…

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